The truth be told about driving in India

Why do random people in India prefer to walk in the middle of the main road instead of on the side of it? Maybe they lack excitement in their lives? Maybe they have so much faith in their destiny of survival? Or are they just plain suicidal because they’ve got nothing left to lose? Regardless of which it is (and yes all 3 conditions are very very sad), the end result is it sends drivers like me careening around them and putting everyone around at risk. Aside to the cops: stop these asinine few and squeeze your weekly quota of bribes out of them instead of me when I’m trying to cut lanes to avoid maiming them.

Why do Indians never use their side-view mirrors, or completely remove them?! Do they not understand their use and value? Do they really want to skin another car a few inches closer without breaking their mirrors? Or are they just so “forward looking” that the mirrors don’t matter once they’ve skinnied past the last auto or freaked out mutt… and they’re on to their bright new future of other vehicles to skin by? Regardless of which it is (and yes all 3 conditions tell me Indian drivers are amply insane), the end result is it leaves drivers like me begging for mercy as we shinny our skinnies past them, and of course puts everyone on the road at risk. Aside to the cops:  stop these asinine few and squeeze your weekly quota of bribes out of them instead of me when I’m peacefully engaged in an illegal though much less dangerous phone conversation with my giggly girlfriend.

And why do stray dogs and cows lie and doze off smack in the middle of the street? Are they mocking us humans? Are they so bloody bored with the world we give them that they feel safer on the road? Or have they too gone stark raving mad in this land where chaos was invented and Murphy is re-born every few seconds? Well, maybe it’s because they don’t give a flying woof (or moo), and the cops can’t squeeze a penny out of them :). Ok ok I will stop here now. Let’s not drag our poor and adorable pi-dogs and holynesses, respectively and respectfully, into this mid-week rant of mine.

So there you have it. Randoms, side-view mirrors, and animals – all staking a claim to a road that my taxes go toward diligently repaving 8 times a freaking season. Keep and eye on road and your truth will be told too!

vikram